The American Republic officially returned the Statue of Liberty to the Europian Union today claiming "Hey it just didn't work out...."
The 151ft , 450,000 lbs statue that once marked the entrance to New York Harbor was given to the emerging nation of America as a bond between France and her sister democracy. Dedicated 1886, the statue stood as a glorious oxidizing beacon to third world nations like an iconic billboard of the American dream. One Hundred years later the dull green exterior was replaced and a 24k gold coating was plated on the torch the colossus held aloft. This was later removed to boost the reinstated gold standard after the 2011 wall street collapse and replaced by a fiber optic network of shinny lights that a consciences of New York residents claimed to be "just as f' en good.." In 2130 after rising sea levels had all but made entrance to the statue impossible, the army corp of engineers moved the upper torso of the statue to its current beach front location in Elkins, West Virginia. Teresa McCoremack ,Secretary of The U.S. Park Service said "It was well and good that we return the statue to its former owners. I think things might have been different if the inscription read "Give me your Inspired, your Motivated,Your huddled masses yearning to invest in a free market economy,The recycled refuse of your teeming shore.Send these, the homeowners, investment-glossed to me.I lift my lamp beside the golden opportunity." Who knew who might have been attracted then?"
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